Area 51

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It’s secrets are known only to the military elite. I’ve read rumors that even the president doesn’t have visitation privileges. Located somewhere in Nevada, the U.S. Air Force base is shrouded in mystery. Access is restricted exclusively to those with the highest level of security clearance.

A passing reference to Area 51 appears in National Treasure II, the film Lily and two of her closest friends watched in the car on the way to Wrightsville Beach yesterday, the official celebration of Lily’s 11th birthday. We briefly discussed the location of and legends surrounding Area 51 and immediately moved on to more significant topics and escapades. Three 11-year-old girls who have known each other for six years generate ongoing silliness beyond all reason and audible natural explosions that rival those of drunken sailors and fraternity boys.

After five hours of sand, surf, and sunscreen, Lily had a hankering for clam chowder at The Dockside, one of our family’s long-time favorites. This birthday extravaganza needed only dessert for total perfection. We made the happy discovery of Rita’s Ice Custard Happiness! Gelatis (“a layering of your favorite Italian Ice and creamy Frozen Custard”) in hand, we loaded into the van for the two-hour drive back to Raleigh.

At some point along I-40, Betsy squealed, “I spilled my slushy in Area 51!” I glanced back to see Betsy’s lap covered in sour apple slushy. As if that wasn’t funny enough to cause me to drive into a ditch, Olivia had to add, “Well, I have sand in Area 52!” Betsy announced, “I can just ride home in my underwear,” but Lily reminded, “You’re not wearing underwear.” The girls had worn their bathing suits in the car on the way to the beach, but Betsy had forgotten to include panties among the items in her change of clothes. Tears streamed down my face as I struggled to control side-splitting laughter and deliver Lily’s friends safely to their parents.

We would be wise to teach our daughters that Area 51 is very special and secret, should remain a mystery to outsiders, and can only to be visited by one who has the highest level of security clearance. ~ cck

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